Marie flew past the morning bustle in the lobby, no one aware of her presence as she floated through the crowd. She reached the sidewalk, her eyes falling on the stack of newspapers next to the boy selling them. Marie quickly scanned over the front page, grasping what she could from only one page. She could not pick up a newspaper every morning and read it like she used to. She took a lot of things for granted in the past.
Lost in her daze, Marie read the date as January 11th, 2013. Snapping out of it, she looked more closely at the newspaper, reading the article about Edgar Maitland's missing, presumed dead twin brother. With that, she was transported 6 years back.
The sky seemed bluer when she was alive, the sun brighter. The cold hair nipped at her skin and the wind tossed her thin golden hair around as she rushed out the door to make it to her weekly breakfast at the cafe on Maine St. with Willow and Grace. They had been friends ever since Marie had moved into the Maitland two years prior, meeting through Marie's teaching job at the elementary school. She was never late, but she got held up by Suzy Kemp in the lobby, gossiping about Ether Maitland's disappearance. Marie really couldn't care less. She could not stand Suzy Kemp, and she hated being in other people's business.
Marie slid into the booth next to Willow.
"I'm so sorry, I ran into Suzy in the lobby," Marie apologized.
"When will she get a clue? No one cares about her gossip," Grace said, rolling her eyes.
"Exactly! All she is doing is creating rumors that most likely are far from the truth. Why can't she just mind her own business?" Willow added, and Marie completely agreed.
Back in the present, Marie felt a pang of guilt when she remembered how nosy she had been lately. But that was soon forgotten when she realized she had another lead.
Ether.
Marie
ReplyDeleteSentence
“Instead of an array of warm colors during the sunrise, all she was met with was grey.”
Question
Why is Mary investigating the death “when she realized she had another lead” yet “she hated being in other people's business”?
Suggestion
Great language usage! It was a very pleasant reading experience. That sentence about the effects of the fog on the colour of Marie’s day was especially enchanting to an otherwise mundane day of mine. According to Ms. Williams, it is conversation that drives the story. Perhaps have you considered making your posts more conversation oriented. Obviously you have included some conversational elements in your post, but this conversation is mostly complementary to Marie’s sentiments instead of advancing the plot, developing the fictional universe or providing character development.